"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and
wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he
cannot be my disciple.” (Luke 14:26)
Does the above verse make you uncomfortable? You’re not alone. The explanation
you have probably heard is that our love for Jesus should be so much greater
that it makes all other love seem like hate by comparison. That explanation
always left me dissatisfied. Can love be measured like that? There is only one
way, and that brings us to Jesus’s central message concerning discipleship: We
must let no one and nothing keep us from following Christ!
The larger context, all of Jesus’s teaching about discipleship taken together,
explains all those disturbing passages, including the one about plucking out
one’s right eye and cutting off one’s right hand! Whatever or whoever stands
between us and Christ must be rejected and counted as our enemy. That includes
our life in this world. Note that Jesus said, “even his own life” (Luke 14:26).
That is the same as what Jesus said in John 12:25—
“Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will
keep it for eternal life.”
Eighteenth-century Baptist commentator John Gill explains,
“. . . these are to be neglected and forsaken, and turned from with indignation and resentment, when they stand in the way of the honour and interest of Christ, and dissuade from his service: such who would be accounted the disciples of Christ, should be ready to part with their dearest relations and friends, with the greatest enjoyment of life, and with life itself, when Christ calls for it; or otherwise they are not worthy to be called his disciples.”
Methodist commentator Adam Clarke agrees,
“He that loveth father or mother more than me - He whom we love the
most is he whom we study most to please, and whose will and interests we prefer
in all cases. If, in order to please a father or mother who are opposed to
vital godliness, we abandon God’s ordinances and followers, we are unworthy of
anything but hell.”
So breathe a deep sigh of relief! If your dear ones support and encourage your faith and
service for Christ, there is no conflict. Indeed, if your loved ones are also believers, your love for God and your love for them are harmoniously united:
‘We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the
brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death.” (1 John 3:14)
“No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his
love is perfected in us.” (1 John 4:12)
The conflict comes when we let our love for people or our love for life in this
world keep us from following Christ. We must make no comparisons nor mince any
words: We must hate whatever would keep us from Christ!